Sunday, June 26, 2005

Boss I Shrunk The Customer's (Don't you do this)

"Boss I Shrunk The Customer's" is the new Nightmare sequel for corporations who are losing customers because of a few mad CRM's who are trying to artificially expand your customer base without truly developing relationships with your clients. Here are two ways you can shrink the customers.

1.) Blindly applying a technological solution to every one of your customer issues and thinking that's the end all cure to all of your customer relationship problems. You've seen phone companies kill more customers than they could ever imagine when they put a huge automated phone service technology to managing their customers.

The End Result: Customer Migration...Causing people to get lost in the maze of the phone abyss until you frustrate the customer to death is one sure fired way to communicate to your boss that you've shrunk the customers.

2.) Attempting to grow your customer base exponentially without putting in the time, the genuine, and the sincere effort to grow your customer relationships one client at a time.

The End Result: Customers lose hope in the opportunity that maybe someday they would really find what it means to get uniquely diverse service from your organization. Creating hope is one of the only ways to avoid shrinking the customers.

If you can think of other ways you've seen companies shrink the customer let us know.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005


Are you an employer or manager and is it your responsibility to over see the workers who are supposed to be part of your *CCT, Customer Care Team? As a manager or supervisor do you ever wonder how your employees really treat your customers? If you've never given this any thought think about it again.

is a very important part of really seeing how your company does business. As a matter of fact hire some people, call into your own business or maybe even have a friend call into your company and determine what level of service your employees are giving your customers. Is it a charm or is it a harm?

Some companies just back off without ever reviewing an employees working relationship with it's customers...that's a mistake. Your customers are the life blood and partner of your organization. Being a CRM may not be enough to take you to the next level with your clients but being a *CPE (Customer Passion Evangelist) will allow you to evangelize every single customer with the passion they deserve.

Is The Third Time A CHARM or Was It A HARM!
We all have heard how the third time is supposed to be a charm. Well today for me and a few of my fellow tax paying citizens the third time was not a charm. Often times dealing with representatives of a company can be an ugly experience. Those who are supposed to be front line employees should know better and understand how they should treat their companies customers. The companies customers belong to the company not to the employee of the company but sometimes workers who are employed by the company forget who the customers belong to.

Although the company gives their employees the authority to deal with their clients they often forget to check the level of service being dealt out. But your lack of knowledge does not bring your customers back from the dead or a harmful experience. It's the companies responsibility to examine using first hand practical direct observation techniques.

Make monthly, weekly, & daily check-ups a thing your company does often.

It's amazing to me how much more money a company could be earning if they truly had employees who were into serving the customer with passion. But sometimes that's not what you get when you meet these frontline workers. Sometimes you get what we got today...a whole lot of grief, bad attitudes and to make matters worse we even paid them for it.

So when you think the third time is supposed to be a charm think about this: Have I called into my company this week or even once this month to test the value of our service? Have I examined first hand how my customers are helping me gain or lose money? Is the third time a charm for my customers or was it a harm to my customers? Think about this!

Sunday, June 12, 2005

New & Improved Repel-O-Customers

Have you ever wondered how your employees get rid of customers faster than your lead department can get them in?

Well you no longer have to worry or pull your hair out trying to figure out how they make all of your prospects or the existing customers you've been trying to retain for a life time instantly dissappear. Because getting rid of customers has never been easier with New & Improved Repel-O-Customers! That's right. Repel-O-Customers, is the quick and easy way to turn customers off faster than an ugly website.

Gives instant protection against customers your CEO has been trying to keep. It's the easiest most logical way to protect your company from revenue sharing customers who want to do business with you! Repel-O-Customers is powerful, effective and may keep your clients away for a life time.

Here's what you get!

1.) Customer Test Kit:
tells you what the customers needs
are. --Instruction Booklet lists customers
preferences, interest and tells you how
much "nasty attitude" to mix in to
your customer care center in order to
get rid of customers faster.

2.) Customer Repellant:
all ingredients come in dry 100% salty
form so that you can "tailor" your entire
customer service departments salty
attitude to effectively destroy your most
happiest customer. The new customer
repellant can arrive at your office, restaurant,
or store today in pre-mixed containers. It's
also available for your Sales, Marketing and
even your Financial department's needs.

Money-Back Guarantee:
on all your Salty Customers who insist on staying.
Repel-O-Customers is 100% guaranteed or
we will refund your customers back to you.
(please include $500 postage for shipping your clients.)

Orders under $10,000 add $150 postage for shipping.